While there are still some people out there who gasp and clutch their pearls at the thought of a woman masturbating and fulfilling her sexual desires, everyone kind of accepts the fact that men masturbate. But we do it in the dark, where no one can see us because it’s our dirty little secret we’re supposed to be ashamed of.
Well, not anymore! Thanks to the sex-positive turn our society took in recent decades, men are getting bolder when it comes to masturbation and everything that comes with it. And that includes male sex toys.
The Role Sex Toys Play in a Man’s Sex Life
Gone are the days when we had to hide our tiny butt plugs and a cock ring or two as something raunchy and so adventurous that we couldn’t bear to speak of it to anyone. Some of us even used to be so ashamed of male sexuality that we made DIY sex toys for men just so that we could avoid going to a sex shop and buying a real one! And let’s be honest — although sexually arousing, those DIY toys had nothing on the ones we freely purchase and use today.
Now, men have a wide variety of fantasy and realistic sex toys for men at their disposal. From masturbation sleeves and prostate massagers to virtual reality, hands-free sex toys for men, we really came a long way! And we’re not ashamed of it!
Men Are Highly Sexual Beings
The theory that women are more emotional while men are more sexual is sometimes considered an absurd lie, but, at other times, a cold, hard truth. It just depends on who you’re talking to.
However, we can say with some certainty that many men have some specific needs when it comes to sexual function. They need more sex, or they need to have sex more frequently. It’s simply the way we are wired.
It’s an evolutionary trait (if you ask some scientists). Men have the desire to have sex as often as possible because of the driving need to procreate. We have to spread our seed wide and far, some would say. But is that really the only thing that’s driving us to pursue partners?
We Use Sex as a Love Language
Let’s be honest here; men have sex for many different reasons. We have an itch that needs scratching, a desire to chase and “conquer” someone for a bit of an ego boost, or we are bored, horny, lonely, loving, etc.
However, men also use sex as a way to communicate with their partners. It’s our version of declaring love and affection. Sex isn’t always a “wham-bam-thank-you-ma’am” affair.
When in an intimate relationship, men will use sex to communicate their feelings. And we don’t mean that they’ll make every sexual encounter an opportunity to gaze into their partner’s eyes, waiting for the pleasure to connect their souls.
No. Sometimes, a man will look at his partner and think, “Yeah, I’d still hit that.” Although some would say quite rudimentary, this is a show of affection.
Men hold sexual attraction to be one of the primary denominators of whether they are compatible with another person. If they don’t find you sexually attractive, they won’t try to build a future with you. Furthermore, if they do find you sexually attractive, they’ll do anything to please you in bed. And that includes discovering more about their sexuality and experimenting with sex toys.
So, men might not say “I love you” as often as their partners would like, and they don’t show it by picking up their socks, but they do show it by getting a boner every time they see their partner naked. And it might be straightforward and “primitive,” but it’s a love language, and it’s beautiful.
But We Aren’t Perpetually Horny
An average man thinks about sex every seven seconds. Have you heard this lie? You probably have as it’s one of the most popular urban myths out there. Everyone knows about it! Men simply can’t go ten seconds without thinking about sex. Horny bastards!
Realistically, with busy professional and personal lives and tasks and obligations that take up most if not all of our free time, we ask you — who has the time to think about sex that often?
Teenagers, that’s who. And even they don’t have schedules so lenient to allow so many sex-related thoughts.
Men also aren’t always in the mood for sex. The mainstream media just made it seem as though men will jump at any opportunity to get laid. The reality is a bit different.
How Testosterone Affects the Male Libido
Teenagers think about sex often because they have high testosterone levels that increase their sex drives. But the older men get, the lower their testosterone levels drop, which affects their sex drive and may even cause sexual dysfunction.
A man in his prime (which is a broad category) who doesn’t have decreased libido needs regular sexual activity. If he can’t get it, he still needs to relieve the tension in some way. That’s where masturbation comes in.
Why Men Masturbate
Let’s get this sorted out right away — there’s no such thing as a “normal” amount of masturbation. Unless masturbation becomes such an obsession that it starts interfering with your professional and social obligations, you’re not overdoing it.
However, that still leaves the question of why men masturbate. Given that not all orgasms are created equal and that our hand simply can’t fulfill us in the same way intercourse with another person can, why do we do it so often?
Look, having some quality time with your left hand releases tension. When we aren’t sexually frustrated, we feel more relaxed, and it’s easier to go about our day. What’s more, it’s also excellent for potential high blood pressure, extreme stress and anxiety levels, and other health issues. So, by masturbating, we actually take things into our own hands and work on bettering our overall health.
Which Sex Toys They (Should) Use
Given that masturbation is healthy (and fun), many men have started looking into buying sex toys to help them have some quality alone time. It’s not that there’s something wrong with a regular hands-on jack off session. It’s just that sex toys provide a new dimension of sexual gratification. They make things more fun and exciting. You would be surprised how many men have been browsing the library of lovegasm for men’s pleasure toys. That only means that we are finally seeing that the buying behaviors of men toward sex toys has become a normal norm for some.
Some sex toys, like prostate massagers, vibrating bullet toys, rimming toys, and many more, can change the way we look at our own pleasure. Discovering the P-spot is the happiest day in any man’s sex life (trust us)! But some men aren’t into that and think that hands-free sex toys that imitate real-life intercourse are way better than vibrating butt plugs that massage those tender spots inside of you. That’s why the sex industry created sex dolls, realistic sleeves, and fleshlights with VR headsets!
A Few Parting Words
Which masturbation toy a man chooses is a matter of personal preference. Luckily, there’s something out there for everyone. Whether it’s anal beads or a life-size sex doll, just remember — using sex toys and masturbating is healthy and will ultimately be beneficial. When you know more about your own sexuality and pleasure, you’ll have an easier time pleasuring your partner. So when you think about it, masturbation, although a solitary activity, is anything but selfish.